Y } Wednesday, August 30, 2006
carol didnt come t school today.
]:
oh wells, i made cupcakes during 'a' girls.
^^
it's nice man. sweet sweeeeet one.
heh. we were only allow one each.
BOOO.
we made 100 plus cupcakes.
that's for all the teachers and staffs, for tomorrow.
we wanted t wrap them up in fanciful wrappers, but it doesn't look nice when it's wrapped in the plastic.
then we all went t watch the teacher's day concert; rehearsal.
shariff [ if it's spelt like that ] sang sooo well luhs.
*melts.*
and gary sang quite well too.
(:
nizar's singing is quite monotone luhs.
x:
then went back home.
w vin and joyce.
i miss doggy; i cried - again.
):
daddy cook fried rice for dinner today.
yummy yums~
thought of doggy.
'cus whenever we eat fried rice, i always give her those luncheon meat, sausage etc.
xP
doggy is cremated today.
we can go collect her anytime.
will be burying her at my house downstairs.
dad says that at least we brought her back t a place where she's familiar with.
and we shall use a plastic to cover, so it won't rot.
i miss her. i wonder if the cremating hurts or not.
\ i'm all about you.
8:29 PM
Y } Tuesday, August 29, 2006
early in e morning, when i'm brushing my teeth, my mama woke up.
i dno why, but she seems t be not very shuang w me sial.
lols, she kept nagging/scolding me till i got out of the house.
-.-''
met vin, wna eat breakfast, but no time.
BOOO.
oh well, i didn't cry in school today.
thumbs up for me!
^-^
oh well, before i got into school, i saw a dog whom resemble brownie, only different colours.
hai, whatever luhs.
i daren't think much anymore.
lessons all e way, self-study, went home [ meet vin ].
hang around at causeway 'cus i diidn't bring my keys and have t wait till my dad reach home.
helped vin find some jobs.
applied for mini toons.
then we went into seoul garden.
e manager accepted.
i was like 'woah, so fast'.
lols.
then i went home.
i cried in e toilet.
hai, i just can't help it anymore.
one whole day of staying cheerful, i finally broke down.
that's it. i miss her.
it feels so weird t hear birds chirping outside my house door, and yet there's no barking.
she used t bark at the birds.
hai. everything's just so different now.
\ i'm all about you.
7:45 PM
Y } Monday, August 28, 2006
to those who cries and wna die for their 'oh-my-so-beloved-and-wonderful boyfriend who is breaking up w me', during your secondary school life :
hello? how old are you now? thirteen to at most nineteen. hey, you thinkyou gna get married w him? hello? if you think that you're gng t get married w him, i think you should just go and bang your head on the wall. okays? i mean it ya? it's not that you can't cry? i know how it feels luhs. i used t feel like dying over guys. but now i realise, guys are ABSOLUTE, COMPLETE JERKS who just appear in our life FOR NO GOOD REASON. hey girls, it's time to move on okay! they aren't worth lar. you just lose a ****ing boy who can get initimate w you, spend most of his time w you. what shit is that eh? it's not as if someone/something died okays. if you wna die for a useless guy, hen what if someone/something die? slash yourself? chop yourself? don't be dumb lar. losing a guy is NOTHING compared t losing someone who lived w you for more than half your lifetime. you people better go think about it. guys are nothing man. nothing at our age. even if one day vin just left me, i wont wna die. if i wna die, i'd rather die for someone who has lived and really loved my for who i am since young and has watched me grow. yes, i'll be sad. but not as sad as losing someone who is really really important. yea, maybe some bitches out there, would think and say " just a dog what. this woman crazy or what. " then i shall shoot you back e question. have you ever lose someone who has been w you since young? eh? all that you know is "my bf dont want me !", and there you go sobbing. now, who is the dumb and crazy one? yea, there's some people out there whom are worse than me, losing their family members. those are the ones who really needs your sympathy. and those who cry over their oh-my-beloved-and-so-wonderful boyfriend, if anyone pities you, i think they are just as crazy as you.
:D
and my best friend, you should know who i'm talking about. she 'insulted' me, and now, i think she's e disgusting one, instead of me.
\ i'm all about you.
8:55 PM
Y }
woke up today, feeling empty.
nobody is awake yet.
]:
went out of e house quickly ; i don't like e atmosphere and it's scary!
so met vincent at the stairs.
not in a rather good mood. didn't talk much. [sorry!]
assemble in class.
just when i wna read my book, mrs whelan called me out.
talked t me about life and death, and her daughter's pets.
i'm sad - i cried again.
she went back t class and ask for tissue!!!
oh god, and they all know i cried.
so paiseh luhs, when i wlak in they're all like staring at me, asking if i'm alright and is it she bully me.
lols.
and even said that if she bully me, they are gng t bash her up [ jokingly].
hahas, [:
i'm fine bar.
i dno.
just kept e tears at e bottom of my heart.
'cus if i keep crying, my thryroid gland will swell up even more.
]:
that's about it.
no mood t blog alrd.
cut my hair today.
i hate it.
nothing is gng on right nowadays; in my life.
\ i'm all about you.
6:30 PM
Y } Sunday, August 27, 2006
i hate you, you hate me.
let''s go out and kill barney.
w a gunshot "bang bang" ;
barney's on e floor.
no more purple dinosaur!
decided not t cry today.
am gng t be a strong strong girl today.
[:
and kept on singing the barney song. [ e no more purple dinosaur version ]
hahas, oh well, i managed t stay cheerful, thou' my heart do hurt and miss her.
but, hai. i dno.
just tried hard t throw all unhappy thoughts behind my head.
went t plaza w mama and vin, had lunch. but mama doesn't seems t be in a good mood. so she didn't join us for lunch. ]:
then went back t ah ma house.
er yi they all came.
and xiao yi they all was alrd there.
after some while, we went t westmall.
'cus xiao yi wna buy some jewellery.
no, is diamond.
i don't like diamonds!
i juust like plain silver/white gold.
so if you're my husband next time, you should feel gladdddd, grinning from ear t ear.
and will not be saying what waichong [ xiao yi's husband ] is saying, "i go out sell ten packets of blood also not enough ah. hahahaha". so funny luhs.
then went t watch "my super ex-girlfriend" w vin.
ate kfc chicken one bus!!!
x:
reached home and mama was crying. i didn't know what t say. oh well, hai.
then dad called. we went downstairs. [bro's girlfriend was there too!]
so e backseat has e four of us.
i was saying, two fat ones [ my bro and vin ] and two poor ones [ me and his gf ].
hahahaha.
we went t yishun's thai restaurant t eat.
i love e sotong luhs, only dare t eat sotongs from there.
xP
bro's gf took cab home, 'cus she stay at punggol.
drove vin home. and reached home at 10.45pm.
damn tired.
bathed, then sleep.
i miss her, still.
\ i'm all about you.
6:03 PM
Y } Friday, August 25, 2006
all that i want now, is you, brownie.
I couldn't accept it ; it's not that i dont want to, it's that i can't!.. i practically hate gng home now luhs, i can't face e fact. it feels so weird, so tensed. i don't wna be reminded.
Brownie, you really have got t take care of yourself up there, understand? eat well, sleep well. be a good girl. go & find ah ma t live w her. 'cus you don't like other dog, right? when you're free, come back home, have a look. okays? few more days, your body will be cremated. don't worry about that okays? [: i'm lonely w/o you, girl. just live your life happily, t the fullest. if i have a daughter next time, i'll think it's you, brownie.
you seriously have t be independent now, take zillions of good care.
i seriously can't help missing you, darling. i'm alone now. nobody is sleeping w me anymore. nobody is gng t eat w me. nobody is gng t go w me for evening walks now. you hadn't see me graduate. you hadnt see me walking down the red carpet, getting married. you HAVE t be my bridesmaid. you can't just go like that. you hadnt take a family portrait w us. there's still so many things undone. but you just went off. how could you?????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
hai, rest in peace, yea? keep me updated through my dream. i'll be waiting for you everytime i sleep.
it's always a rainy day.
you know why?
'cus there's no you, brownie.
\ i'm all about you.
6:58 PM
Y } Thursday, August 24, 2006
went t school today.
though i can choose not t.
but staying at home is worse.
i couldn't sleep.
i kept waking up and cry.
e` house just feel so empty w/o her.
i woke up at 5.55am t prepare for school.
nobody is awake, i guess.
i woke up, i couldn't find her anywhere.
so i started crying in e toilet.
then dad woke up.
i stopped crying.
changed and went out.
saw vincent, cried.
from my house t school t lesson.
all e way.
i'm just damn sad.
and i couldn't seems t be able t vent it out.
it's like never-ending.
i can't help it, seriously.
and thanks t e three of them, who kept me accompanied all e time.
on e way back t class, got stopped by a teacher.
worse luhs, i cried harder.
and ended up in e counselling room w carol.
she's asked t go back t class & if i still don't appear up there in a period, she'd come down and find me.
mrs tan talked t me for awhile. 'cus she knows my condition - i told her.
then she have t go and print some stuffs.
e counsellor - mrs lim keep asking me if i wna talk about it.
and me, who DO NOT wish t talk that time, kept shaking my head.
so she ask me one question, i just nod/shake my head. or just a one-word answer.
she offered me milo, asked if i wna go have breakfast.
i shook my head.
carol came.
i'm soo glad.
hehs.
when she came down, i've calmed down alrd.
i counted- i cried for two hours in a go.
lols.
scary.
went back t class, cried.
found mdm chan, told her that she passed away, and amzingly she said she know 'cus mrs tan told her. =.=
p.e, i just sat there daydreaming. and saw jackson and a group of friends. told him e news, and it shocked him. samuel or rather everyone says that my eyes are swollen.
]: [vin says i look like i've got two fishballs in my eyes. hai.]
physics, tears in my eyes.
recess ate nothing, managed t smile and talk a bit.
eng, i cried and slept.
math, i cried.
cme i didn't.
[:
and when i met vincent, i cried.
yea, i cried and scream and whine like in e morning.
and according t him, it's scarier.
x:
he send me home, under my block, i cried. and i saw people walking their dog. cried harder.
saw e spot where my dog always urinate at, cried even harder.
tried t walk towards there, but got pulled back by him halfway.
i reach home, dad said " you got counselled today ar? your teacher called. she say she'll pray for brownie and us".
i was like, wah, how did mrs whelan know that?..
then dad asked me t keep all brownie's photo for e time being. and tried t talk sense into me.
cried a lil, 'cus i'm afraid that he'd scold.
ate dinner - porridge. my only meal for today.
[:
my eyes are hurting.
\ i'm all about you.
8:48 PM
Y } Wednesday, August 23, 2006
jun feng sent me a mms.
a picture of a little dog.
oh well, thanks.
when i got back home today, i saw my dog lying there. my brother told me that she can't stand. her legs are like jelly. which meant that she cant walk too. she hadn't urine for the whole day. 'cus she cant even stand. i tried to bring her to e toilet to see if she wants to urine. but she can't stand. she tried to, but in e end she laid there. just laid there. i carried her back. it seriously hurts my heart. i don't think i can stand it. i'm gna break down, i guess. i fed her water. i think there's something wrong luhs. her tongue. as if she's trying to bite her own tongue. and it also looks as if there's something stucked and she's trying to make it out.
then my dad came home, told him about this tongue thing. he said that no, it's her body organ. her mouth is smelly, 'cus her organ inside has started to rot. he asked if we wna give her e` jab t lessen her pain. hearing that, my tears couldn't be controlled anymore. he said that if e` dog could speak, e` dog would also choose to have e jab and goes off. he suggested to give her a jab to sleep, then give her e jab t go off. we, four of us [ dad, mom, bro & me ] would carry her while e doc gives her e jab. so at least she goes off in our arms. yes, it's heartbreaking and sad, of course. but we can't be selfish, and let her suffer there, just to have her by our side. she's just dragging. we had already gave her e best we could to save her and stuffs. we gave her e best shelter, e best companion, e best food we can. we have already did and love and dote on her wholeheartedly for e past eight to nine years. and now e time is up, sheng lao bing si, is part of our life. the decision of whether t give her e jab now is w my mama. if she agree, then most probably, if brownie can survive through this night, we will bring her down t e vet by tmr. the last night w us. i dare not think of the thought. ah ma, ah gong, xiao yi, wai chong, jun kai, jun yi and my brother's friends came t look at her for one last time. it's so saddening.
we would probably put her ash under our house block. we cant put it at home. 'cus we didn't even put our ancestor's, and we put our dog's. my dad think it's ridiculous.
now, ten plus, my dad decided t reduce her pain. gng t bring her down t mount pleasant t put her t sleep. 'cus we are afraid that she won't survive through tonight. and nobody will be beside her when she goes. so off we went. she laid on my laps. hai. during e journey, she kept biting, and when we reach, her tongue bled. i saw her getting e jab. it hurts like hell. no, it's worse than hell. normally, she would struggle. but this time, she just lie there. half e jab and she's already gone................................................................ i tried t shake her awake. but, my bro stopped me. he asked me t let her go................................................................... i don' t want, i don't bear t. i felt as if my world is upside down, inside out. ah ma cried. everyone cried. i saw my dad wiping his tears off. we talked t her. ah ma dragged me out of e room. why? 'cus i think i've cried badly inside. we went home, back into e car. we went there; eight people. and we came back w seven.
HOW COULD THEY???!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THEY DIDN'T WAIT FOR HER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SHE'S IN E COLD COLD COLD COLD FREEZER WAITING T BE CREMATE. SHE WOULDN'T KNOW HOW T COME BACK HOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'M GNG T BRING HER BACK. SHE PLAYED ENOUGH. IT'S TIME T COME BACK HOME, BROWNIE. YOU WENT OUT AT 10.52PM. IT'S TIME T COME BACK ALRD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! COME BACK.................... I WILL GIVE YOU ANYTHING YOU WANT. JUST COME BACK............................... TO US, HEALTHILY.
\ i'm all about you.
7:02 PM
Y } Monday, August 21, 2006
special thanks t vincent, ivan and samuel raj who tried very hard t console me.
went t study w elgin after spending some time w my indees. then we went t e school library. oh well, forget about all those stuffs. vin came t fetch me, and when i got home, my brother told me that brownie went t e doc tooday. diao shui. she whined. in e end, she just lay still, shivering. it simply breaks my goddamn heart t hear that. worse come t worse, she's gna die within one week. and if she survive through it's great great great and great. but... hai, i can only hope so; that she will survive through this. her liver is spoilt. now, whatever she eat, she vomit it out. which e doc says, maybe her organ inside aren't functioning anymore. she can't digest anything. most prob, she'd starve t death. i hated all these. it's worse than losing a bf. she has been by my side since i'm pri.1. can you imagine? she's such a pretty young lady. whenever i cry, she never fails t be by my side, consoling me. whenever mama wna hit me, she'd bark. there's so many things she did. so wonderful.
i thought nothing would happen, that time when she have got diabetes, it gave us hope as there's medicine t cure. and during that period of time, she's perfectly healthy. until yesterday, when she refuse t do anything, t eat anything. we bought her favourite durian and yet she dont wna eat it.
it hurts too much t think about it.
\ i'm all about you.
10:05 PM
Y } Saturday, August 19, 2006
I'M GNG OUT W MY BOYFRIEND LATER.
GNA GO PREPARE.
SO EXCITED.
SO LONG NEVER GO OUT WHOLE DAY LER.
URHS, WEEKS?
YA, I THINK SO.
SO, BYEBYE PEOPLE!
I'LL KEEP YOU UPDATED.
:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D
huiqi is a happy happy girl !
\ i'm all about you.
9:31 AM
Y }
yeasterday night ; again .
reached home ; prepared t sleep.
saw that i had a miss call ; weird number.
called back and found out that his voice is like jane's.
i forgot that house number don't have caller id.
"who called this number just now?"
"huh. i dno."
*silence*
"okays, then byebye"
*hangs up.*
it's weird luhs.
then i called jane.
"hello? you now at where?"
"outside"
"you not at your friend's house?"
"no."
"then byebye."
i don't feel like talking t him luhs.
fucking attitude.
jun feng called.
i told him about it.
then he wants e number.
"6383**1*"
"you wait. i help you check. okays?"
"okays lor."
then when he came back, he says nobody answer.
can't be luhs.
i mean i JUST called.
so fast nobody at home?
so i asked him t call again.
*repeat e number*
"eh!!! you idiot. you playing me ar. give me wrong number. the person say e number not in use!!!"
"hurh. you kuku jiao arh. repeat e number t me again."
"6383**7*"
idiot luhs, i say one then he thought is seven.
-.-
he called, then the person say wrong number.
duh.
you know why? 'cus he bloodily asked if jane is home.
....................................................................
forget it.
so we chat and chat.
second line ; wait and wait. no patience, hung up his phone.
lols.
called vincent, then caht, halfway, mr nice guy called. tell vincent that i'll call him later 'cus someone call me.
he's upset.
so i in turn asked mr nice guy t call me back later.
i'm tired.
]: after all those walking t causeway.
booo.
hung up w vin, slept.
phone suddenly vibrated.
woke up w shock.
hahas, mr nice guy called.
told me lots and lots of stuffs about jane.
i'm felt soo disgusted luhs.
and i decided t only tell this t my good bud.
:D
then i told mr nice guy that i'm tired and wna sleep.
then he ask me if i wna be his mei.
then i was like okays lor ; why not i be your jie.
okays, lame.
whatever.
then he ask again, why not you be my gan lao po.
*hurhs..............................*
"later your girlfriend take chopper and chase after me"
he laughs, and i'm tired! so i said, okays lor, i anything lar.
*sleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep*
:D
i guess something is wrong w my voice. jun feng and vin says that my voice is weird.
become soo low.
>.>
'cus why? 'cus i'm cold and i'm sick.
and i'm lazy t take ejacket and i'm lazy t take e air-con remote control.
double booooooooo.
and mr nice guy says my voice sounds like his girlfriend.
which meant in my normal voice, i don't.
'cus there's something wrong w it last night.
hahas.
oh yayaya!!!
"you still remember how e bear looks like? the one you gave me."
"ya, of course lar, i give you one leh."
"...... you know hor, got quite some people says that it looks like you! eyes cannot see one, hand long leg long. normal bear bear is short short cute cute one lor."
"...... you counter attack me enough alrd anot? haha, like that then cute mar."
"...... you know what present you gave me on my birthday this year?"
"no, i asked them t buy then i pay money."
"what the hell. okays, it's eeyores. one is pillow one, one is bear bear one. and hors, the bear bear one hor, is those old old eeyore. looks like you lehs!!! eyes droopy, sloppy sloppy one."
*evil laughs*
"..... eh, counter attack again. you want attack, say all now lar. hahahaha."
"don't want leh, i have t think first."
"................"
"ehs, you still remember this month's 22nd is what date? you know this month's twelve is what date?"
"no. what date?"
*he doesn't sound convincing.*
"22nd is i break w you. twelve is take neoprint."
"ooooooooooooooh. ya hor."
"seventeenth lehs?"
"that one i know!!!!!!! *he got all excited* is e day we're together!!"
"amazing. haha, which month?"
"april."
"wah, not bad not bad. you this kind also will remember."
"hoi. counter attack again lar."
to my boyfriend: DON'T BE JEALOUS AH. xD
\ i'm all about you.
8:51 AM
Y }
sms-ed w jun feng last night.
oh well, he gave me some talks about guys.
which are like soo amazing luhs.
hurhur.
xD
soo glad ; he has grown up.
he's not like the little boy last time.
xD
sms w him while i do my math practise.
good girl hurh.
xP
then dad went out t fetch mama from work ; gorgor went t meet girlfriend.
which meant i'm alone at home ; just like now.
booooo !
]:
never mind about that.
then i called dad and ask if i can go causeway basar malang meet vincent.
then he say i was about t ask whether you wna come anot.
hahas.
so i went t inform vincent.
meeting him at interchange.
i was still messaging w him.
i took my wallet.
and remembered that i hadn't wear my lenses.
went t wear, open e door, put e keys at e table [ which meant i didn't bring keys ].
and, "BOM", i closed e door.
AIYA ! NEVER TAKE WALLET!!!!!!!!!
*panic*
call vincent, no answer.
DOUBLE BOOOO!!
then no choice, i practically walked t causeway okays!
first time in my life.
i don't wna walk alone. so i called jun feng.
"eh, you free now? call me lehs."
"orhs, okays lorhs. i was about t call you alao liao."
*delights*
he called, and i told him what happen and complain.
lols.
i had t walk fast luhs.
if not, later they wait until very long.
and somemore 'm sick!!!
TRIPLE BOOOO!!!
then we chatted and chatted.
soo funny luhs.
he say i leg short short, walk fast also won't fast until where.
];
then i say short short cute mar.
he almost vomited.
xD
when he cough, i laugh at him ; he says i bian tai.
hahas, then when he sneeze, i say someone is cursing you lehs.
he says : no lor, someone is missing me.
oh well, i almost vomit.
xD
walk and walk and walk.
i kept complaining that it's soo goddamn far.
and he insisted on saying that it's not far.
RAHH.
and he say i made his bomberman die.
oh god, he's playing bomberman, again.
i was like laughing until kuku jiao luhs.
then he kuku jiao also.
lols.
then i met vincent.
hang up w jun feng first.
then i met vincent.
i was sweating like dno what shit luhs.
he thought i just bathed come out.
then as i walked nearer, his jaw almost dropped.
xD
*exaggeration*
lols.
i'm sweating like mad luhs.
have t go basar malang find my parents.
worse luhs!
hotter.
hahas.
i wonder how i looked like.
worse come t worse, i lined up for my ramly burger.
hahas, finally went t causeway and walk around.
my parent went back home first.
and we walked around.
[:
\ i'm all about you.
8:24 AM
Y } Friday, August 18, 2006
不管天荒地老, 我会一直爱着你.
trust me .
'cus i know will .
my brother was t cook fried rice.
and me, being huiqi, the helpful one x: helped him, of course!
xD
dropped an egg on e floor.
HAHAHAS.
and i was playing w e egg yolk.
"gor, you think i can take up e egg yolk?"
"you've watched too much television show."
*gives this face* -.-"
okays, there's six eggs.
i took up five and left one.
"eh, left one only sial."
"don't play liao lar."
*heck care*
*took e last one up............*
"hoihoihoi!!!!!! see?????!!!!!!!!!!! can leh!!!! faster take my phone here!!!!"
"whoa......"
*speechless*
"this brand der egg good. haha. they say egg yolk that can be taken up are good eggs. what brand huh?"
"hahahaha. don't know leh."
"aiya, take my phone here."
"where?"
*walks into my room*
"not there lar!!! the brown table!"
"where?! don't have."
*walkes back t e living room*
*where? don't have what*
"aiya, where's your phone?"
"charging".
*gives that face again*
"you see that brown table?"
*walks wrong direction again*
"here!!!!!!!!!!!!!! not there!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!*
"orh orh orh!!!"
*on my phone*
*snap!*
this is how long i hold e egg while my brother went t find for my phone.
steady right.
xD
*no children. t be supervised by adults. what you have seen is taken with care and professional help. please do not try that at home.* xD
if you say , i'm always yours .
\ i'm all about you.
4:20 PM
Y }
what if one day , i tell you that i love you?
would you tell me that you love me too?
today chemistry paper ; last paper.
XD
happy luhs.
lols.
wasn't feeling very well.
so went home early.
papa came t fetch me home again.
& i slept till now.
[:
talked&sms w valerie yesterday night.
:D
he's not avoiding me like last ti me ler!
soo happy luhs.
was like soo high w carol yesterday at my house.
played w coins.
i jumped around on my bed & we kept screaming.
XD
oh wells, we said evil things.
and e` coins say that it'd come true!
HAHAHAS.
valerie taught me chemistry.
& his sister taught me too.
so paiseh luhs.
-.-"
valerie is sick.
"AWWW".
xD
he's got fever, flu, headache, sore throat.
whereas i have sore throat&flu.
xD
he says that i passed him e` virus!!!!
$%^#&!*@()_+=-
it just felt soo good that he ain't avoiding me alrd.
[:
yesterday is such a great&wonderful night.
[x
vin's friend says that maybe i'm tooo young t understand&appreciate vin's doings.
blah.
he can choose not t be w me lor.
>.>
whatever luhs.
and they said that maybe after vin left me, i'd appreciate more.
heys, vin's friend, if i don't appreciate, i wouldn't still wna be w him right? what's wrong w you guys? look at e problem in another angle luhs. i'm soo tired of reading those stuffs lor. whatever luhs, i'm not gng t care anymore. just write whatever you guys want. it's his blog what.
i'm not gng t let that spoil my mood.
:D
i gave you my best.
but you gave me your worse.
what do you want, baby?
\ i'm all about you.
1:13 PM
Y } Thursday, August 17, 2006
carol's been coming t my house t study tgt!
hahas, until night around eight plus.
[:
hardworking girls = smart smart girls like us!
XP
oh wells, wish us good luck in our exam results!!!!
XP
\ i'm all about you.
2:33 PM
Y }
it's not that love doesn't go your way.
it's just that you let go of your love too easily.
oh wells, today is a boring day.
and a loonngg loonngg day too.
but not for me!
i went home early.
not feeling very well.
thus, my wonderful papa came t fetch me back.
;D;D;D
ate chicken rice today for recess.
XD
can't eat cabbage anymore!!!
]x
thyroid just sucks BIG TIME.
bleahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
>.>
nothing much today.
didn't do welll for geog paper.
wasn't feeling well, then my mind just went blank.
];
the questions are direct.
but too bad, just blame it on my dumb brain.
];
apple doesn't look like she's in a good mood in e morning.
WHAT'S WRONG?
]:
don't be sad or whatever luhs, okays?
[:
baby, do you know that I've been missing you since the day I know you?
& only now that I know that you couldn't be mine anymore.
\ i'm all about you.
2:21 PM
Y } Wednesday, August 16, 2006
i'm in school now!!!
apple is printing.
i'm teaching her how t use it - two sided one.
and i know!!!!
i'm such a smart smart girl~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
XD
\ i'm all about you.
1:45 PM
Y }
th memories stucked in my head.
how wonderful that is.
how?
how could your life be happier w/o me?
you don't say that t me.
you never.
you used t tell me that you love me.
i don't wna believe that.
you say you're the one who is always giving in.
BULLSHITS.
i thought that phrase should be me telling you.
it's time forgive&forget.
vin fucking look at my
i don't think it's a diary anymore.
'cus it's been seeen/read.
blah.
i'm sooooo damn fucking PISSED!!!!
songs are magical.
they makes you feel loved, smile and even cry.
\ i'm all about you.
1:12 PM
Y } Tuesday, August 15, 2006
rainy days just reminds me of you.
how am i supposed t forget you?
that's a stupid thing t say t a girl.
'cus a girl would cry even more.
playing w a girl?
FUCK OFF LUHS.
whatever luhs.
i know you aren't.
i chose t believe my instinct and things that i see.
but, what am i t you?
someone who you can rely on knowing more of her friends, which meant knowing more pretty&sexy babes?
haa, sorry then.
'cus i'll leave.
i'm not that nice.
you're e one who turn me nasty.
how could you say goodbye t me when i haven't even give you one last kiss and a big bear hug?
\ i'm all about you.
1:02 PM
Y } Friday, August 11, 2006
today finally went t school.
ss paper ; DAMN IT MAN.
i know how t do ALL e` questions lorhs.
BUT NO TIME.
fuck fuck fuck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i only managed t write SEQ, one and a half page.
didnt manage t do SBQ.
fuck luhs.
two SBQ and one SEQ for forty five minutes.
think we what.
can write so fast?
FUCK MAN.
after that, went t english class.
mrs tan seems t have a good mood.
hahas, which meant that e class is high today.
hahahas.
hmms, math lesson.
revision of chapt five.
i know alrd, but still listened.
then went t f&n.
chatted w apple.
told her that i fell down and cried.
she laugh like dno what.
just like samuel.
]:
humph.
laugh at me.
*anger*
hahahas, ya samuel, i gets angry w people easily. but my anger dont last long.
[:
apple knows that!
hahahas.
oh wells, we chatted about boys.
hahas.
hmms, apple should be happy.
jun sms apple first.
hahahas.
mdm chan seems pissed w us.
hahhas, 'cus we kept talking and laughing.
XD
i've always love f&n lessons.
then recess.
ate chicken rice.
'cus REBEKAH LIM never come.
XD
soo happy luhs.
no SS.
ahahahs!
e teacher saw me w my phone.
and just say you can use, but just dont let any teachers see that when they walk past. and put your ear piece at another side luhs, so they wont see.
so nice right this teacher.
after school, met apple and carol.
carol had choir.
s it left me and apple.
went home~
and vin came w cotton candy, coconut and muah chee.
:D:D:D
thanks!
then he go back t school after a few chats.
i went t eat.
and here i am, typing all this craps.
hahahas.
XP
\ i'm all about you.
2:53 PM
Y } Wednesday, August 09, 2006
oh wells,
i called carol today again.
asked her what did she and samuel talk about.
oh wells.
then samuel called.
i was surprised.
i swear.
then we talked.
problems solved.
conclusion : you dont give me attitude, i dont give you attitude.
solved.
:D:D:D
OH GOD OH GOD,
carol lost her phone!!!!
some UNCIVILISED , POOR people stole it.
fuck him/her laas.
if you cant afford a phone, then fucking admit that instead of stealing people's.
carol, i know how you feel. hmms, you still have your pink one right. so cheer up! save money and buy a new one okays!
[:
t vincent,
stop questioning me can? it's tiring t me. it's annoying. i've told you all this that time when we quarrel lorhs. seriously laas, if this is t continue, i think breaking up is a better choice. you're making me feel that having a rship isnt a easy task, isnt a happy thing. it makes me feel like my life is controlled, spied and everything. i didnt wanted this kind of rship. i wanted one that would give me my own privacy and all. MY OWN LIFE. get it? you told me that you'd give me more freedom. but did you? have you? ehs? i couldnt possibly give you my 24 hours, 100 percent attention. this is me. i'm more t my friends side. okays? you just have t get this clear. if you want a girl who is like you, then maybe you have t reconsider whether you still wants me as your gf. okays? we know each other for like one year plus. but all this doesnt means that we know each other very well. after our first 3 months, it's like our true colours come out, and here our misunderstandings&quarrels come. i dont change for anybody. 'cus i know that as time goes by, my true self would come out again. changing for a person makes you very plastic, very fake.
arghs, whatever luhs. i really dno what i can say.
\ i'm all about you.
8:49 PM
Y } Tuesday, August 08, 2006
hmms,
went cwp at around four?
dad allow me t go 'cus he say that i'm a good good girl!
heh!
went w vincent, 'nd went t walk around.
saw james, he was w another friend [dno what name luhs.] then he wna go see fireworks.
vin wanted too.
but had t ask my dad.
dad allowed, but had t reach home by 10.15
]:
we got no time, so we decided t go sengkang , which reminds me of that durian-headed boy.
hahahas.
hmms, by e time we reach seng kang, it's about time t go take bus back t woodlands.
HAHA, but being huiqi, i went t e CC.
there's a national day celebration.
dance floor ; but nobody was dancing.
walking around.
SOO LAME.
hahas.
then we took bus back.
soo lame luhs.
ahahhas.
hmms, went cwp t buy sweet talk.
saw agnes & apple, zhao ming, leon, blah blah blah.
hahas.
samuel sent me a msg, something like let's not contact each other for e time being.
i'm heartbroken luhs.
reached home, asked carol t help me.
i bathed, and someone came t my house t take our fish away!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
soo sad.
humph.
i secretly conferenced w carol and samuel.
oh wells, he didnt know at first.
but he found out.
'cus i thought he wasnt around, and talked.
XP
oh wells, i told him while i cried, " this is e` decision you made. i will let you be. so long as you're happy, i'll be happy. okays. that's all i wna say. bye."
i know he's pissed.
oh wells, i didnt cared that much that time.
i just cried like there's no tomorrow.
oh wells, and then i called carol again.
asked her t forget it, just forget about talking to him.
hais, hmms, she asked me t stop crying and sleep early.
oh wells, i slept.
w not a very good mood.
but carol, thanks for being there for me. [:
i love you bud.
\ i'm all about you.
8:30 PM
Y }
didnt go t school today.
:D:D:D
national day celebrations.
oh wells, maybe it's fun luhs, but i just don't wish t wake up early t sit in e hall for e whole morning.
that's like soo boring luhs.
some more i don't have t perform for this national day.
might as well not gooo.
but i'm missing cindee and lindee.
[;
early in morning, i thought i was gng t school , i woke up.
then i thought i heard vin's voice.
then i heard my brother's voice.
i thought i heard wrongly.
so i went back t sleep.
then when i woke up, i searched for my phone.
and saw a note --
" to dearest !!
today never bring you go eat so i bought le happy meal for you.. hehe.. i dont know who you going to eat big breakfast! hais maybe with him...? who knows? remember t brush your teeth before you eat!
love, vincent."
i was like................ so i wasn't dreaming?? ooooh.
then i went back t sleep.
hahahahhas.
i was like missing jane soo much luhs.
\ i'm all about you.
2:22 PM
Y } Thursday, August 03, 2006
t those people who tagged about e` samuel thing:
first, i dont think that my life is any of your business. 'nd i hated vulgarities. if you wna scold, fuck off from here. this is not e` right place. yes, you can call me a bitch, a slut, whatever names. i dont care. 'cus so long i know what i'm doing, okays? scold me whatever you want, i dont care. just stop scolding MY FRIENDS. all that you all knows is just a one-sided story. who listens t my sorrows, my part of story? who really really knows what happening here and in my mind? let me tell you, it's me. who dont side their own friends? yes, you side vincent; 'cus he's your friend 'nd you people listen t HIS part of story. and yes, apple, carolnye and jeron is w me. 'cus they listen t MY part of story. so stop all this as if you all KNOW EVERYTHING. okays? how would you feel if you were in my shoes? ehs? terrible? happy? i dno luhs. it depends on what YOU are doing. yes, i'm not saying that i'm NOT in any wrong. i'm not saying that. 'nd it's my life. i know he loves me. but have you people thought about WHY i became like this? you didnt know i was this kind of girl right? yes, i didnt know that i would become like that. immature? maybe. but WHAT ACTUALLY changed me? think about it. e` more you tie a person t yourself, e` more he/she wanted t go 'nd so called explore. okays? just think about it. and for vincent, i'm sorry.
\ i'm all about you.
7:07 PM
